Mystery Cliche
by Canadian Reaper
Summary: I can't do a summery sorry, there is a bit of violence tell me what you think if you decide to read.


**Mystery Cliché**

It was a stormy Saturday in London at 6:00pm when I got the call.

'_Ring, ring.' _

I heard the phone as I walked into my small office, "Hello this is detective Alphonse what can I help you with?" I asked the person on the other end of the phone.

"Yes I know who you are, it doesn't matter who I am so don't ask, now on to business-..."

"Wait, what are you talking about?" I asked a little warily.

"You need to learn how to listen now I want you to go to Ms. Bullet, it seems your services are needed, a murder mystery has happened .Now go!" The voice explained angrily.

Now I knew I should have ignored the voice, but after I hung up the phone, a knock at the door came.

"It's open," I called still wondering about the call _'who was that'_.

"Um boss we just got a call, a murder happened at Ms. Bullet's home!" Explained my secretary, .

'_Odd very odd,'_ I thought. "Ok I'll be there," I answered. I grabbed my hat, my jacket, from the coat rack and my pipe, from the ash tray next, I put my gun in its holster. After I took one last look around my small and messy office I left.

When I got to the Bullets house, I stood waiting outside the gate as the rain continued to fall on me, as I looked at the house a bit more I saw that it was in dire need of a makeover the paint was falling, two windows were boarded and I'm pretty sure that there are holes in the roof in short it looked like a haunted house.

'_Creak'_ went the gates as they opened after a while, I walked through. '_Bam_' they shut loudly almost making me jump (I do mean almost no matter what anyone says I did not jump, and scream like a little girl).

"Hello, I guess you are the detective," said a short roundish man in a tuxedo, (who reminded me of a little penguin I once saw at the zoo) then he continued on not waiting for my answer, "the mistress will fill you in," after he was done talking he turned on his heels and walked down the hall.

I followed the man who I could safely assume was the butler down a long hallway filled with pictures and statues.

I stopped to look myself in a long mirror, when I saw myself I almost died of horror at what I saw, in the mirror there was a man who looked less like a detective and more like a hobo off the street.

My hat had done a horrible job protecting my head from the water. My jacket was covered in mud and had some holes in it. Also, I looked like I hadn`t eating in days or slept for that matter turning away from the mirror I looked around to find the butler, when I saw him I quickly ran to catch up.

When we finally, got to the living room some people who I assumed were staff members were present along with Ms. Bullet were waiting.

Ms. Bullet wore a mourning dress it was a long plain black silk dress.

"Hello," I said as I bowed, "I got your call about the murder who, where, and how did they die?" I asked looking at everyone before turning my gaze on Ms. Bullet.

"It was my son, he was stabbed, I found his body in his room!" she cried, her head in her hands.

"I'm the maid Holly," Holly introduced herself. Holly was a small Italian girl in a black dress with a white smock tied around her waist.

"I'm the family butler, the name is John," John said stiffly, "the wild eyed man is the gardener Phil."

Phil was a French man from Paris he had long dark greasy black hair that looked like it hadn`t been clean in months he wore light green shirt and dirty dark blue overalls.

"And last is me, the name is Claus, I'm the cook," he said. Claus was the German cook, he wore an old pastry chef's hat, a red scarf, and a white cooks outfit.

"Is that everyone who was in the house at the time of the murder?" I addressed the question to Ms. Bullet.

"Yes, that's all our staff since the master, my second husband, died two years ago." Answered Ms. Bullet quietly refusing to look up.

"I'll need to see the body and none of you are to leave," I addressed everyone. Looking at each of them in turn with a stern gaze.

"The body is in his room still, we have not moved it," Holly answered my unspoken question of where the body was. "This way please," she motioned me to follow so I did.

**In the hall**

"When did he die?" I asked suddenly hoping to catch her off guard, well we were walking down the hall, but in a different direction then before, we were heading to some stairs.

"Around 5:30pm sir," she answered sadly without looking at me, "he was too young to die he did not deserve this."

After a about another minute of walking We came to some red carpeted stairs that we then began to walk up, once at the top we turned left, and continued walking down a plain wood hall.

Finally we stopped at the last door. "This was his room sir." She pointed at the door well moving away to allow me room.

I nodded at her and slowly I walked in and uncovered the body.

"Ouch," I whispered just looking at the body you could tell he couldn't have been more 17. "What's his name?" I asked Holly not turning around.

"His name was Will," she answered "may I go now; I have to prepare your room."

I nodded silently, I heard her walk down the hall .After, I was sure no one was around I started to examine the body. On the body there were 5 stab wounds. _'Talk about over kill,'_ I thought shaking my head, _'amateur.' _Next, I took a blood sample because it seemed that whoever killed him drugged him first, for there was no sign of a fight, unless the killer was good at cleaning up.

**Later**

Later that night we all gathered around the dining room table and we began to eat together in an eerie silence.

Out of the blue I decided to announce my findings, "I have examined the body and have concluded that Will died from loss of blood, from the 5 stab wounds," I surveyed their reactions carefully before continuing on, "also, he seems to have taken a heavy dose of valium,"

After I finished there was a strong silence only broken by the muffled sobs of Miss Bullet, as we continued to eat.

When I finished my meal I thanked Claus, "thank you for the meal Claus."

"You're welcome Mr. Alphonse," He smiled a wide toothy smile at me.

Later, as I sat in the room given to me thinking about the murder. I knew it had to be someone with accesses to drugs and knives which could be anyone, but who had the most motive for killing him why not the Mistress.

**The next day**

The next day well siting outside on the porch, Claus came to me with a serious look on his face replacing the usual go-happy smile, and said, "Sir I've been thinking about what you said, about Will having valium in his system, well the only person who has accesses to it is Phil, come I'll show you," He began to walk away, not waiting to see if I was following or not.

I debated following or not finally I decided to follow. I wondered, why Claus was being so helpful, I followed him out in to the hall, and down the stairs, into the cellar.

He pointed, "See this is where he keeps it," smiled Claus.

"Hmm you're right" I answered uneasily, _'How does he know about it?' _I wondered instead I asked, "Where is Phil I need to talk with him now?!"

**Later in The room**

Later, in my room I stood looking at Phil who sat in a chair, he seemed to be in a world all his own.

'_Bam'_ the door flew open.

"What is this? Phil has a mental problem!" shouted a red faced, very angry butler.

I opened my mouth to talk.

"That's why he has those drugs so that he can sleep furthermore, he was eating with me and Holly around the time when will died so none of us could have done it," explained John, seeming to calm down even though his face was still flushed with anger.

For some reason I believed him. I turned to look at Phil, "I apologize Phil," I told Phil looking at him.

Then Phil looked up with his greasy black hair creating a slight curtain over his face as he started to open and close his mouth, at first, we thought nothing of it when all of a sudden a noise came out of his mouth.

"What did you say?" I asked leaning closer to hear.

"C…c…Claus-" Started Phil.

"What about Claus?!" I interrupted my hands on Phil's shoulders.

"Killed w…wi…Will," Explained Phil slipping back into a world all his own.

"Ekkk!" Came an ear piercing scream.

I jumped straight in to action shoving a frozen John out of my way I ran out the door and ran down the hall jumping the over the railing, to the doorway of the living room.

There, sitting backed into a bookshelf, was a pale with fright Miss. Bullet, she did not even spare me a glance for her wide eyed gaze was locked on another.

I turned my head following her gaze towards a figure in the shadows, when he stepped in to the light I could not help but let a gasp fall from my lips, as I recognized the figure of, Claus, holding a spork smiling wide, with a deranged look in his eyes.

"I'm going to take back what's mine!" He giggled turning to me. "Why hello detective," He smiled tilting his head innocently, "since you are here, that must mean you have solved the mystery, that I killed Will, which means I'm going to have to kill you also!" He pouted slightly before getting the deranged look back in his eyes along, with a greedy smile on his face, he raised the spork and started towards me.

As he started towards me I pulled out my gun and pointed it at him, "Put the spork down Claus, I don't want to hurt you!" I pleaded.

Claus did not seem to hear my plea for he took another step forward.

'_I did warn him,'_ I thought sadly, as I unlatched the safety, and pulled the trigger, the bullet flew straight into his chest, he was dead before he hit the ground.

At the sound of the gun Phil, Holly, and John came running in they looked at Claus with the blood from the wound spreading around him, staining the once white carpet red, then they looked at me, with my gun still raised as I slowly turned the safety back on an replaced my gun safely back on my person.

No one said a word for what felt like ages.

Finally I broke the silence, "the killer is taken care of," I spoke lacking all emotion, nodding towards the late Claus.

"I...I...I'll get the cleaning supplies," stuttered Holly as she walked out.

When she returned she brought a bottle of stain remover and a large cloth, the latter of which she handed to me and John. After accepting the cloth John and I warped the body in the cloth, and carefully picked it up and walked out the back door to dispose of the body, after we went back to help clean up the mess.

**Later that night**

Later, that night after getting rid of the body we sat in the living room.

"Why did he attack?" I asked still trying to wrap my head around what happened.

"The will that the late master left," explained John.

I looked at him, hoping he would explain more.

"The master wrote a will that left everything to us ,but then he got married, and wrote a new will leaving everything to his new family, I can only assume Claus was angry about that," John Finished sadly, leaving us yet again silence.

Many years later, I found myself walking past the Bullet's home, I stopped for once, and looked through the gate smiling, everyone was happy, Phil was getting help for his mental problem, John could smile, Holly was more open, and Miss. Bullet, made the home into an orphanage so, she would always have kids and be able to help them to, and lastly Claus, well he's buried under an old oak tree just outside the property line.

The end


End file.
